Fourth of July and More

The embassy celebration

We learned on Wednesday that the American ambassador had invited all expats to celebrate the 4th at the ambassador's residence. He isn't into community building and wasn't interested but with some "encouragement" from staff, he relented. They provided some meat for barbecue; not steak-like meat, but good. They had ground meat for hamburgers, a bit coarse - but beef, not a mystery meat. Great pulled pork, tender not soupy or over-cooked, just great. All attendees were invited to bring something as a side dish or dessert. There were some great sides, one was a great potato salad and a tomato and mozzarella cheese. Some of the other missionaries said you dare eat things like that? I did and no problems. One senior sister didn't fare so well but she was the only one I know of who had a problem. There was an apple pie, a pumpkin pie and the best cinnamon rolls I have tasted. Fun late afternoon. By 6:00 pm it was mosquito-bewitching hour so we left.

Elder Smith saw a tall man arrive and he said, "Is that Dikembe Mutombo? Everyone in our group said "Who" or "No way". Mark was determined to "test" the possibility, so he walked over and wagged his index finger and the man burst into a laugh and smile, yes it was Dikembe Mutombo. He was born in Kinshasa out in a village near the airport. He has funded a first-class hospital in that little village and visits often. His wife and two sons were with him and he was asked to make a few remarks.

Dikembe tells Mark he was Defensive Player of the Year in the NBA four times.

Also attending was the wife of Joe Biden who was in Kinshasa to accompany the Ambassador-at-large for Women's and gender Issues around the world. They have "projects" they want to promote - issues such as gender equality and alternate lifestyles.

       

They had an activity for the children. The Marine detachment assigned to the embassy challenged the children to a tug-of-war. The Marines were tough competition but the children prevailed.

We are still "out-of-the-loop" about where the PEF Self Reliance Center office will be. Yesterday the comment made by Frere Didier is that we will stay here in the S&I building. We were looking forward to be within walking distance to Kayser and Nice Cream. To compensate for this, Mark has documented the pastries available at Kayser as a reminder of what could have been.

Mark loved the pastry called "Religieuse" (chubby nun) when he was in Paris as a young man.

The inside is essentially a super-rich truffle fudge. $4 for an outrageous treat for two.

We had a meeting in the Employment Center, now we pray that they don't make us move there. It's a mosquito haven, shabby shabby, and the occupants do not "see" things (like dirt, disorder, and noise) the same way I do.

Traffic has been a little lighter in volume but is unchanged in execution, cars nose to nose, side to side and all honking at someone else but nothing happens. You just wait as the "deck" gets shuffled but as with a deck of cards, the shuffling is not always one card at a time.

The container has arrived

Ryan, the Church construction manager here in Kinshasa, lives in Provo and offered to bring items from the U.S. in the shipping container that was coming from his company because it would not be full. The items were gathered in December and shipped sometime after with expected delivery in March, 2014.

It never arrived, so trying to find a container bigger than an elephant proved to be difficult. It was tracked to a certain port but was not received there because the dockworkers were on strike so the ship went to another port and dumped it there.

It took weeks and weeks to find that much out and it proved to be a problem because the local that was ready to help it get through the challenging process of having a container cleared had to have it land in the first port. So it has taken almost four months to locate, beg, borrow, and bribe to get the container released. It arrived this week and Ryan delivered two boxes yesterday. We were expecting the plastic tub Janine had prepared but we also received a box from Wayne and Julie and their children. We opened both and were so thankful for the efforts of Janine and Ralph as well as Juli and Jen and others in the Gale family, oatmeal (much needed), floss, and many things like that. Wonderful CD's with great music to listen to and the richest of chocolate. We will be the hit (we hope) around Thanksgiving if the pumpkin pies materialize as well as cranberry sauce for "turkey", more likely a big chicken (not quite ready to pay $45 for a 6 lb. turkey). The chocolate and nuts are always in demand. Thank you Janine & Ralph.

The other box was a surprise and a rather emotional unveiling. It was from Julie and Wayne Hardinger with a document recounting their experiences with life altering realities. It was an expression of emotions across the spectrum. How do you react when you are told that you will die and it will be within a very short period of time? The personal perspective ended in December because the box was delivered to Ryan to be put with the other things. With all the world-altering experiences they were going through they were so thoughtful and loving to gather wonderful items that will make our lives more enjoyable here in Kinshasa.

The sadness comes from the fact that the box took longer to get here than the cancer took to extinguish the mortal probation of Wayne. We didn't have a chance to thank him personally but I'm sure Julie had a lot to do with the wonderful assortment of goodies like chocolate chips and dried whole eggs. We are making many cakes for PEF loan holders when they make a $100 payment to reduce their debt, so dried eggs will come in handy. The family picture is a treasure, thanks to all who helped and shared time and means. Tears were shed. These experiences make me want to be better so I can live eternally with family members that have made a major impact on my life.

Thank you family,

Elaine & Mark

Couples Conference

The couples from the mission gathered to Kinshasa for a conference. Half of the couples will be in another mission come July 1st when they change our boundaries. Two came from Cameroon, one from Pointe Noire in the other Congo, and one from Gabon. Names are Baileys, Colemans, Moodys, and Gates (the same one that is serving here; they were sent to Cameroon to fill in some gaps that exist with couples coming and going.)

Officially, July 1st the Brazzaville, Congo mission will take half our mission, all the countries outside of Kinshasa, DR Congo; leaving only Kinshasa and surrounding areas in the DRC for President and Sister Cook. The Cooks have been and are still on the road almost all the time trying to get things ready for the division. There will be no North Americans in the Kinshasa mission after July 1st except the senior couples.

We hosted the couples for meals that weekend and all three couples used the Bybee's recently vacated apartment as the "hotel". The official agenda started Monday morning, but all the couples were here from Saturday. Sunday we went to church together and then had a family home evening with all the couples.

Monday "the Smiths" were asked to discuss the topic of strengthening companionships. Since it was a rather short outline, we want to share the main bullet points: 1. "It is easier to love someone than to live with them." 2. "Love is a fantasy, living is work." Both of these quotes are from a movie called "Reversal of Fortune". The rest of the time was a discussion of how can one teach or help others to learn to work as part of the gospel. Enough of that.

Great lunch at Mission Home!

In the afternoon we were entertained by the Humanitarian missionary couple showing how to organize a maturation project. That evening was a "Family" meeting. A brother in the Church named Da Tarr shared his story of conversion and his life in Liberia, Sierra Leone, Nigeria, and Kinshasa. He is an inspiration of faithfulness and dedication to his beliefs. He went through imprisonment, loss of jobs, family, death threats, etc. and remained faithful. He is suspect here in Kinshasa because he isn't a local and since he won't play the "sharing" mentality so expected here (the sharing mentality is if you have something - I want it - and you are obliged to give it to me).

Tuesday was mostly for the "out-of-towners" because the area support offices are here in Kinshasa and if the couples have concerns about the branches where they live/work they have to deal with a Church employee, so they needed to work things through with a real person not an email.

Tuesday afternoon we went out shopping for fabric, church distribution items, groceries, art at thieves market, and whatever could be fit into a short time. The evening we had movie night in our apartment with popcorn. 

Wednesday morning we went to visit the Bonobos. We left about 8:20 am and arrived after 10:00 am. The trip is one of those experiences that is typical here but not enjoyable in any way, trust me on this. These singes are considered the most "human" of all apes, but they still look like an ape and smell like animals. (The babies were cute, though.)

I never liked going to the zoo because of the smells there, so you might understand that this marathon was not my favorite "field trip." And to add insult to injury we have dozens of mosquito bites to prove the point.

We finished the day at the Mission Home and Thursday we returned to our assignment in the PEF office.

Frère Mutombo, our director, was in South Africa the week before this so we had a lot of catching up to do in the office. Not much was done while we were away so we have to dig in again.

We will be seeing big changes in PEF coming "Soon" - just like the shipping container that has many of our requests, needs and loving gifts from family expected in March is still "coming soon"!!! It is on a truck but they are demanding more money (again) before they will release it.

The ward we attend here in Kinshasa is called the Gombé Ward in the Kinshasa Stake. Missah Tarr was directing the choir and asked me to play the piano, it was a great experience, the choir sounded great, so each Sunday since I have been able to or asked to play the organ for Sacrament meeting. The only problem is that the chorister chooses the songs during Sunday School and lets me know 10 or 20 minutes before the meeting. It can be interesting.

Our nephew Wayne Hardinger

The month of May will be remembered because our beloved Wayne Alva Hardinger died Saturday 24 of May 2014. Wayne was the first grandchild of both families, the Hardingers and the Gales. He was born July 2, 1960. I remember driving with Mom to visit Virginia and the new baby at the Roosevelt Hospital. He has grown into a giant of a man in many ways, tall and handsome, hard worker, a dedicated father who loved his wife and children and grandchildren. The Lord has welcomed him home.

Grandma Cleo lived close to the major railroad through Provo. On one visit Wayne, Donald and David wanted to get a close-up look at the train that was passing. I was outside and granted them permission to go. That train was southbound. I checked down the street and saw them watching the train. Because of the noise of the first train I didn't hear a second train going the opposite way. I ran to the street yelling their names but when I looked down the street - no boys. I thought, 'Virginia will kill me.' I got halfway down the block, certain they were dead, when the first train passed and shortly thereafter the second train passed. Standing in the middle of the road between the two rail lines was Wayne with one younger brother under each arm, all excited about the up-close and personal encounter with two trains. Wayne survived many experiences that were close encounters and made choices that helped him become great in our eyes as well as in the Lord's eyes.

Elder Neal A. Maxwell said to Elder Bednar, “I have learned that not shrinking is more important than surviving." referring to his lengthy chemotherapy.   "We too can plead with the Father, just as Jesus did, that we ‘might not ... shrink’—meaning to retreat or to recoil (D&C 19:18). Not shrinking is much more important than surviving! Moreover, partaking of a bitter cup without becoming bitter is likewise part of the emulation of Jesus”

Elder Orson F. Whitney said, “No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of such qualities as patience, faith, fortitude and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure, especially when we endure patiently, builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more tender and charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God ... and it is through sorrow and suffering, toil and tribulation, that we gain the education that we come here to acquire”

Elder Bednar said, "strong faith in the Savior is submissively accepting of His will and timing in our lives—even if the outcome is not what we hoped for or wanted."

Elder Bednar was referring to a couple facing similar trials as Wayne and said of them,"[they] desire, yearn, and plead for healing with all of their might, mind, and strength. But more importantly, they would be “willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon [them], even as a child doth submit to his father” (Mosiah 3:19). Indeed, they would be willing to “offer [their] whole souls as an offering unto him” (Omni 1:26) and humbly pray, “Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done” (Luke 22:42).: strong faith in the Savior is submissively accepting of His will and timing in our lives."

The last conversation I had with Wayne was just after his cancer diagnosis and he said, "I don't want to die." He also added that he would do everything he could to survive, he wanted to live. As the disease progressed he too accepted the will of the Father and his timing.

Elder Bednar's talk was a CES fireside last year. The URL is attached.

https://www.lds.org/broadcasts/article/print/ces-devotionals/2013/01/that-we-might-not-shrink-d-c-19-18?lang=eng&clang=eng

Kinshasa Stake Conference/Mother's Day

Today we attended the Kinshasa Stake Conference. The chapel where we attend church is also the stake center so conference was held there. Yesterday was the adult session. As always, no one seems to know what time meetings begin. I was told it started at 2:00 pm so I trusted the source and I insisted that we go early because it might be full way before the start - I should have known. We arrived before 2:00 pm. Oh yes there was a meeting that started sometime around 2:00, but the men were meeting in the chapel and the sisters were in the Relief Society Room. "Please go to the Women's meeting, Sister Cook is in there." Sister Gates and I declined; we are not in leadership callings in the stake. We asked again and again and finally there was a consensus that the general session for all adult members started at 3:30 pm. Sitting in the hot foyer the Elder Smith and Elder Gates decided to go across the road to the supermarket ShopRite and buy some bottles of water. As they returned, the doors opened into the chapel and the crowd gathered for the meeting.

We do enjoy meeting with the saints here, there is always a choir big or small, and they can produce a great deal of volume.

We have been blessed to work with many of the leaders because they are employees of the Church. The President is an area Temporal Affairs representative, his first counselor is an employee in the finance department and the second counselor is in the military and is in our ward.

They spoke in French unlike Didier's Stake when they spoke a mix of Lingala and French. Their messages were exhortations to be more faithful in their personal lives - not any different from talks that we hear in Utah. They have some unique challenges not seen in the U.S. like a dowry called a dot (pronounced "dote") which requires the man to comply with the demands of the woman's family to pay a certain amount in goods and cash as a "payment" for the daughter - the old idea that the more the man pays the more cherished the bride will be. The families of the couple arrange a meeting where demands of the bride's family are presented. President Eustache Ilunga told of some families that include in their demands the make and model and size of the HDTV and even the brand name of the shoes, bag and the designer dress they want for the bride's mother. He had them laughing, but this "tradition" has many of the young single adults wanting to marry but unable to do so because they cannot meet the demands. This is not a new concept, but it doesn't seem to be changing among the members of the Church. One leader, also a stake president, in a joking mood, compared the dot to the demands made of Isaac from the parents of Rachel. Abraham had sent many gifts to the family of Rachel as a token of their sincerity and their respect. Some also interpret the marriage laws in the DRC as requiring a "dot" because one of the official acts of a marriage is to meet in front of a magistrate and sign documents that they accept the offer made by the groom's family.

There are some parallels with "Society Weddings" when money is spent that forces the families, mostly the bride's family, to pay for a huge wedding sometimes causing financial problems for that family for a long time.

He also mentioned behaviors that are not acceptable among members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. There was a report that a man had some money stolen from his pants while he was dressed in white clothing to be baptized, cell phones disappearing from bags while attending church, food being taken from a church event before the event started and taken away for personal consumption, projectors disappearing from a table in the RS room, and more. He mentioned leaders who 'cooked the books" so they could get more funds for the ward, even if the funds are used to "build the Kingdom"; the rationale that it is all right to 'fudge" the numbers for a good cause. President Ilunga said, "Think again".

Sweet Ryan Dain brought roses for each of the Senior Sisters serving here and wished each of us a happy Mother's Day. He has a challenging assignment to build chapels and hopefully a temple here. Each day reveals a new challenge.

The wet season

One sleepless night with a thunderstorm raging outside, I went to the living room window to watch the lightning. I got halfway to the window and realized that I was walking or slipping in water. I turned on a light and saw a stream of water coming out of an electrical outlet on the wall. I hated to wake Mark, but when one suffers we all must suffer right? We mopped from midnight to 4:00 a.m.

This was the second "flood" we have had. The first time was when an AC unit clogged up and drained into the house. This flood was caused when rainwater overwhelmed the draining system in the flower boxes around our apartment. The rain came again the next day, and another flood to clean up. The third day it started again, so I got out the little shovel Mark bought and started digging into the beds that surround the apartment and started bailing water over the edge of the planter box down to a "patio" below. We were able to slow the flow and rest our backs from the bending. The building where we live is part apartments, level three to ten, and the first three floors are occupied by USAID. The building was constructed thirty years ago or more and the system of draining these flowerbeds worked, but as the roots have grown and clogged the holes they don't work as planned. Well I created holes deep enough to act as catch basins. So far so good.

Catch basin in flower bed just outside living room window

Bailing out the catch basin

A few days later, we had plumbing problems, so workers came in and "fixed" it so it does not work at all and the promised fix has yet to be completed. We do have a second toilet so we still have facilities. Then the tub faucet sprung a leak, so we called the mission office (they have jurisdiction over apartments) and scheduled someone to come and check it out. Didn't come when they said, so we went to the office. Some water was then leaking but it went into the tub, not to worry. Wrong assumption. When we returned at 4:30 pm the whole apartment was flooded with at least an inch of water from the front door to the back corner. We started the task of cleaning this up after trying to turn off the water into the apartment, finally finding the right valve. Elder and Sister Bybee stopped by to get drinking water and ended up spending an hour helping us mop up. Elder Bybee found the best tool was a dustpan. Thank heaven for good people like the Bybees. The Super, a local, got involved when a man that lives just below our apartment complained about water covering his living room floor. Next day repairs were made and all is dry.

The church General Conference was another great time; we were able to use a wireless modem, a projector, and a wireless speaker to host the couples for conference sessions. We were able to watch four sessions live streaming and the priesthood at 6:00 am Sunday, thus Sunday started at 6:00 am and ended at 11:00 pm, well worth it. We also attended three hours of church between Priesthood Session and Sunday Morning broadcast. Great day.

iPad and nano projector with conference image on the wall

Sister Cook asked the senior sisters to help her with a Sister Missionary Conference. Each sister gave a talk; my topic was getting along with your companion. Sister Cook instructed the sisters about the use of sacred funds among other things and gave each sister an apron she had made. The sisters wanted their picture with the aprons and they wanted to pose with Elder Smith and Elder Bybee who were wearing their wives’ aprons to emphasize that men do household work alongside their spouse and children.

Presenters Sis. Sneddon, Sis. Bybee, Missionary Training Ldr., Sis. Smith, Sis. Johnson, Sis. Cook

 

Bon Weekend!

We were able to do something different this weekend. Saturday Elder Smith played basketball, the only day he can awake and get up before 5:00 AM. He had a good time because he played on President's winning team. I was awake at 5:00 AM but my day started with laundry and Permethrin treatments for bugs in the apartment. I tried to think of something different to cook and decided to make tapioca.

The manioc plant, the most common plant in every garden here, produces the main ingredient for foufou and tapioca. We have tried foufou and it's hard to describe, but Mark calls it library paste. Leaves of the manioc plant are cooked and eaten as greens like collard greens, and the root is processed to make foufou. The root is "beaten" with a wooden mallet until it is a fine mash and then they add maïs to make it a tasteless dough. The locals prepare delicious sauces and the foufou is like bread that is dipped in olive oil. It has the consistency of homemade Playdough. It may be that the orientals made a similar dough but turned it into "pearls" that are dried and reconstituted in a liquid to make fillings thick. Our tapioca was a bit thick, but with a little (a lot) of whipped cream we were able to "smooth" it out a bit.

Saturday afternoon we joined other couples to attend a dance concert called "Rhythm in Motion In Celebration of Black History Month". Sister Ellsworth is the Director of a English Language Institute in Kinshasa and invited us to attend their concert. All the dances were accompanied by drums, even the dances that originated in the United States. There was a young woman playing a violin, first instrument besides a guitar, recorder and keyboard I have seen here - oops, I forgot the drum. The professional dance troupe displayed great athleticism and performed for about an hour and were about as energetic at the end as they were at the beginning. A couple of members were in the intermission troupe. 

  

After the show we were invited to a barbecue at Ryan Dain's apartment. He is the Construction Manager for LDS chapel projects and the Kinshasa Temple project. It looks like he is committed to work here for at least five years, maybe more. He has had two short-term helpers that will be returning to the states, giving us reason for having a social.    

The food was great, the company was great and we were able to meet Papa Norman, a Kinshasa legend. Papa is a native of Kinshasa and a member of the Congress and was a very wealthy man when a coup toppled the dictator Mobutu and put all those associated with him or his regime on a hit list. He was able to get his wife and three children on a plane to South Africa. He had worked in the airline business, so he had plenty of tickets. He was secreted aboard the plane through the catering services where he had connections. He left South Africa and went to Zambia, but had to flee when he was told that the "new" government was demanding he be extradited back to the Congo to face charges (and certain death). He then fled Zambia and flew to Washington DC and started application for diplomatic immunity. It was a long process, but he was able to live in the U.S. He is a big man with a booming voice so he sold hot dogs and hamburgers on the street. Later, with another change in DRC leadership, the charges against him were dropped and he was able to return and claim his property. While he was in DC he met LDS missionaries while he was selling hotdogs. They asked him if he would be interested in a message about Jesus Christ. The Congolese are accommodating, so he said yes.

Like many Congolese, a message about angels and heavenly visitors was believable to him. He agreed to go to church on Sunday which was a fast-day meeting and they left very confused. They decided they would find and go to a Baptist church instead. However, the missionaries did not give up on him and did service for him like shoveling out his snow-covered car and a "Secret Santa" Christmas. He and his family returned to the LDS Church.

The elders took the family to the Visitors Center and they walked around the Temple. As they walked he heard words like, "This is the true Church of Jesus Christ" and "Joseph Smith is a Prophet". He, his wife and three children were baptized in 2000.

The CEO of Westland Construction, Stan Houghton, has a son who was the missionary that taught Papa Norman the gospel. When Westland was discussing temple construction with the Church Temple department, he told them about Papa Norman and he has been instrumental in getting to the right people here in the Congo, making the process a little easier.

Dean Schick, Papa Norman, Stan Houghton, Larry Turley, and Ryan Dain of Westland Construction

Sunday we had another great adventure. We attended the Conference of the Ngaliema Stake. President Jean-Pierre Haboko works in the office next to our PEF office and invited us to come.

President Haboko consults his iPad.

We asked the Bybees if they would like to go because they knew (sort of) where to go. President Cook was also invited, so the three couples got in the President's SUV and headed out with Pascal, the Mission Office Manager, guiding us in another vehicle. It was raining and didn't seem too challenging for the first part, but closer to the chapel it became a "typical" DRC duck and dodge game. President Cook said it was the fastest time for him to make the same trip. He said it usually takes an hour and a half; today we did it in twenty minutes. We were ushered to the front row, not our favorite, but there were only six mundeles (whites) in the congregation of twelve hundred. Great meeting, but hard to follow because they mix French and Lingala at will. But the choir was a special treat. Choirs here rarely sing up to tempo, but this was up-tempo.

After the meeting we rushed to another chapel and then another chapel trying to find a baptismal service. President Cook had promised the husband that he would personally attend so after a longer-than-twenty-minute trip we arrived at the chapel to participate in the baptism of two women and one man. President Cook had conducted the baptismal interview of one of the women and had to say no because she said that she was not married. The husband and three children were already baptized (about a year ago) and President Cook wondered how that happened. The woman left in tears. Later the husband called president and explained that his wife was embarrassed because they had been married in a civil ceremony, not a big fancy public marriage. She didn't think she could call herself "married" officially. President Cook then wanted her to know that she was worthy to be baptized, and he promised to be there personally.

These little girls were at the meetings with their families, and they could all be sisters.

 

We have had a quiet evening and are ready to call it a day.

Elder & Sister Smith